How to Choose a Bridal Veil - Bridal Tiaras

A veil is traditional and has the added bonus of obscuring whatever emotion decides to crawl out on my face as I walk down the aisle, for even the greatest joy on earth can turn into a clown face when a body’s excited. That just wouldn’t be good. So maybe a nice heavily embroidered veil is the answer after all. But I’ve heard that veils make your hair into haystacks. Wouldn’t that make a hat the better choice? A hat just sits there, cocky and self-assured, telling the world I’ve really got a handle on life. Unless… What if my hat makes a crease in my hair the size of the Grand Canyon? How would it look at the reception if my groom couldn’t keep his eyes out of the gully on my head? No. Can’t have that.

Tiaras are beautiful. But all that glittering could blind a person. And wouldn’t it be rude to require my guests to scrape and bow like peasants? After all, if I wear a tiara, wouldn’t everyone assume I’m royalty and act accordingly? I’m pretty sure I don’t want to be known as the new Mrs. Uppity. A circlet suits my free-spirited nature. But I could end up looking like a Renaissance Faire groupie, or worse, resemble that eleven-year-old me still waltzing with a paper heartthrob. That’s just scary. Flowers. A discreetly tucked orchid at my ear. A cluster of magnolias at my nape. It sounds so lovely. But I’m pretty scent sensitive and I can’t overlook the danger of approaching the altar with something shooting out of my nose on a sonic boom of a sneeze. Then when I fainted from embarrassed horror, my groom would fall upon me to perform CPR and our wedding pics would forever immortalize a wide-angle shot of my almost-husband’s rump above my inert sprawl. Nope, flowers so close to my nose are definitely out.

And, well, hair adornments are just dangerous. What if that barrette or comb or clip doesn’t stay put? What if I turn my head too fast and the unreliable little buggers launch themselves from my head like bottle rockets and pop the minister in the eye? Will the service still go on? Will I still get to become a wife? Head hardware is too risky by far. I just don’t know what to do. I’m desperate. I’m this close to shaving my head, painting some doves onto my bald scalp, and calling it a day. But then I’m quite certain the torrential rain destined to fall the morning of my wedding would smear the painted doves into something resembling a snowy white cow pattie. But wait! Rain? What was I thinking? They do make bridal rain hats, don’t they? Help me!